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September 19, 2010

Elon College Freshman Girls Small Group Reunion Weekend

Alternately titled: Who needs therapy when you have great girlfriends?

Alternately titled: Why is crying so therapeutic for women?

Alternately titled: I can't wait until next year.


I'm pretty sure I was the first to cry. I'm also pretty sure I was the last one still crying. I'm positive I was not the only one that cried. But let me start from the beginning...

For at least 2 years we have been trying to plan a reunion of the girls who were in our Freshman Girls Small Group bible study together. It was a group that, at the time, we all just liked being part of, but would all realize in the years to come was pivotal in each of our lives.

Almost 13 year to the day of our first meeting, about a thousand emails, and almost no formal planning whatsoever, 6 of us from the original group gathered together at a lake home owned by one of the girls' in-laws. We each needed to be there for very different reasons, and yet we all had come for the exact same reason. 13 years ago a bond had been formed that would forever bind us to one another.

Between the 6 of us there are 7 1/2 children, 5 husbands, 3 dogs, 2 cats, and 1 single girl. Yes, in case you hadn't picked up on it, that last one is me. And in case you don't pick up on it by the end, that same last point is the basis of all things involving tears on my end of the weekend.
Courtney's known her husband practically her entire life and their son just turned 1.
Katie met her husband in college and their daughter will turn 1 in just a few weeks.
I introduced Sara to her husband when we were in college and their son will be 3 in December and a second is due in February.
Anna's known her husband since high school and their daughter is 2.
Susan met her husband shortly after college and their kids are 2,4 and 6.
And then there's me.
Don't get me wrong, I've traveled the world, gone to grad school, I stay out as late as I want (which, lets admit, isn't very late), spend money on whatever I want...and I do it all alone.

On a daily basis I feel like I am surrounded by co-workers who tell me how lucky I am not to have a spouse at home upset about how much I work, married friends who remind me how much harder married life is than being single, pastors who preach about being content in the life you have and trust in God's plan for my life of singleness right now. And most of the time, all I want to do is scream, cry, and run away. But I don't. I smile. I nod. I agree that they are probably right.

Which is why I needed this weekend. There is a closeness, an easy vulnerability, a knowledge of each other without ever having to explain yourself that somehow formed between all of us when we weren't even paying attention.
Instead of having to put on the brave face, the smile that I was screaming behind, I finally let my guard down the crumbled. And they knew.

We all cried this weekend. Some for the people that are in their lives, some for the people they'd lost, and some for the people we wish were in our lives.

But we also laughed. A LOT!



p.s. court....no pictures!